By Allison Gingras
“Be still and know that I am God.“~ Pslam 46:10a
I sat with a priest friend complaining about how I was trying to follow all the rules of the faith, but I still felt empty. I checked all the appropriate spiritual boxes, so why did I not feel the love of God?
Let God Love You
Fr. Joe, with the sweetest voice, said, “Allison, when are you going to allow God to love you?” Well, there’s something I hadn’t considered. Connecting with God as Father was a challenge; having struggled with my relationship with my earthly father, I honestly didn’t know how to let God love me because I wasn’t entirely sure how that felt.
Fr. Joe instructed me to spend time in quiet with God. Don’t ask for anything, don’t try to feel anything; merely sit and listen—pray for the Holy Spirit to open your heart to receive God’s love.
Grow in Love
Back home, I stared out the window at the clouds and the heavens, thinking that might help. It didn’t. I closed my eyes, took a deep breath, and began to recall cuddling with my dad and watching NASCAR races on Sunday afternoons. I remembered the contentment, security, and joy of those shared moments. Suddenly, one of my boys yelled for me. Although I wanted to respond, “Hey, don’t you see I’m trying to have a moment with God—don’t bug me,” It didn’t seem the proper reaction of someone working to grow to understand God’s love.
After caring for my child’s needs, I returned to my cozy spot and, within seconds, once again felt peace, safety, and connectedness. But, wait, was this being loved by God, the Father Almighty? Yes, to me, it was! He is always there, waiting, and available for simple moments together. I didn’t have to do anything special, merely be present, and I’d see He was with me in every moment.
Prayer
Heavenly Father, you are love. I know in my intellect that you love me, but my heart struggles to allow you in. Heal the wounds holding me back from letting you in. If only for a moment, please help me lower the barriers to experiencing your love.
Call to Action
So now I ask you, are you allowing God to love you? Sit in a quiet place, breath, relax, and allow yourself to experience the Father’s love!
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Thank you! I often struggle with doing all the “right” things, but not feeling like I have done anything. Like going through motions without feeling. This reflection will help me.
Beautiful reflection Allison!! ❤️
Okay, Sister Allison you hit the nail right on the head once again!!! There’s me still trying for the human doing rather than human being… Loooove this, and bless you once again