By Sharon Wilson
Untitled via Pixabay.
When he finished speaking with them,
he put a veil over his face.
Whenever Moses entered the presence of the LORD to converse with him,
he removed the veil until he came out again.
On coming out, he would tell the children of Israel
all that had been commanded.
Then the children of Israel would see
that the skin of Moses’ face was radiant;
so he would again put the veil over his face
until he went in to converse with the LORD. Ex 34:33-35
Today’s first reading speaks of Moses coming down from mount Sinai with the 10 commandments and that his faced glowed. We have all seen the Charlton Heston movie of the 10 Commandments and how Hollywood painted a healthy suntan on Mr. Heston for the movie. What they didn’t include in the movie was that he veiled his face after talking to the people and only unveiled it again to talk to God and then for a while after.
Little details in scripture like this sometimes nag at me. Why did Moses veil his face? A little research and a fast forward to 2 Cor. 3:12-1. “Therefore having such hope, we use great boldness in our speech, and are not like Moses, who used to put a veil over his face so that the sons of Israel would not look intently at the end of what was fading away.”
Moses didn’t want the people to see the glow fading from his face. If the glow faded – so might their hope.
Paul’s letter to the Corinthians reminds us that WE are NOT like Moses! Our hope does not fade.
My conversion to the faith came like a great big bang. I fell in love with God hard and I remember feeling that I must even look different because I felt so different inside. Knowing God loves you does that!
But alas, it has been over 15 years since the big conversion and I have experienced ups and downs and times when I didn’t “feel” that love, but mature love is much more than a feeling.
As I have grown in my faith I have come to learn (through the help of good confessors and my spiritual director) that God’s love for me is not dependent on my feeling but it is up to me to continue to act in the hope of that love.
I wonder if I have always been able to show that love through the down times? When others see me do they see a woman aglow with God’s love? I need to make sure that in those occasional times when I feel doubt that I veil my face and take it to God less I might give the impression of my hope fading away.
How do you show your love, faith and hope when you just don’t feel it?
About the Author:
Sharon Wilson – Wife, Mother, Writer, Catholic Speaker, and a WINE Specialist. Sharon has a degree in education and has worked as a freelance writer, Respect Life Coordinator, a teacher, in advertising, radio, buyer and in youth advocacy – She even rode an elephant in the circus once! Sharon speaks, writes and shares about God’s healing and about the great gift of being Catholic.
Sharon, I so get where you are coming from in this blog post. I understand the difficulties and struggles of discipleship, where, like any marriage, our relationship with Christ continues to grow and transform with every passing year. Oh, if only I could stay locked away in the honeymoon suite with my beloved Jesus forever! Alas, however, I am called to do more, to go out and become His hands, His feet, His voice, and His heart to others, to His Body. So, to answer your question, how do I continue to show love, faith, hope and joy when I sometimes don’t feel it: I try to remember my early physical and spiritual encounters with gladness of heart, but also try to recognize the life giving love that is moving within me. This is the love of the Holy Spirit, which I am called to share with others. This love is self-sacrificial and life giving. It allows me to be a conduit of Christ’s love and joy to others, for now my intimate time with Jesus is not only personal but also communal. Now, His life giving love and hope springs forth from Him through me to others. I guess you could say that I have been called to “go out and be fruitful” for the Kingdom of God. This “spiritual motherhood” is a delight for my soul. Thanks, Sharon, for putting words to my current spiritual journey!
It inspires me to speak of God’s love to myself or to a friend. To remind myself. To turn it over in my mind. It is said that love covers a multitude of sins. It’s referring to my loving and my sins. But turning that over in my mind, I look at it a little differently. Looking at Jesus on the Cross, imagine the size of God’s love as He takes on all the sins of the world throughout all time upon Himself. How great that Love is that covers such a multitude of sins. And he loans that Love to us, to give it to others. In the face of that Love who can dare to sin?